I would suggest that, yes everything is our choice to experience; that we must not forget that everything is a part of our choice– It is not our narrative that makes these decisions, but that it is our choice to experience narrative which gives color to experience beyond the experience itself– To think anything is out of your control, is to misunderstand the power of what you are experiencing now– It is simply that we chose to experience somethings out of our control, and this is an agreement to experience ourselves as separate beings–
That is we have given ourselves a sphere of consciousness in which we can begin designing our narrative, but that our narrative exists within a collective one.. and it is not a matter of aligning your narrative to the personal and immediate desires which are based on falsehoods, but the collective will and intent which means your desires within that intent is 1. part of your original desire and so greater, to the extent that you would fear desiring such a thing for yourself. 2. your desire of such proportions or ratio is absolutely supported by the whole of which you are and are a part of in experience–
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At the level of realization I speak of, there are revelations that have personal consequences, as well as consequences upon the narrative at large– Since you speak from personal consequences of intermingling separation, which is a gift and a curse; let me say that there is a collective narrative that will have far more reaching consequences than any individual narrative at play, and that which will guide every personal narrative if so one should choose to follow the story we are all experiencing, which allows for every personal story to reach its own greater height–
I know that in a certain sense, you feel like mankind is alone in this endeavor of ours, but that this process is indeed universal; and that there are illuminated members of society (far and distant from each other with purpose) working towards the original intent or impulse of our collective decision which in spirit is specific, but in form is liberation itself–
And that I would point to you to meditate on.. is not the intent of your own choices to experience something a certain way, but why we would choose to experience such a sorrowful state as this, and what great vitality it would have to the most glorious fruit ahead in which we shall all partake without exclusion, but to which all partaking will appear to be an individual conclusion in the collective result– Think about the intentions behind that which you did not intend, and reconcile them into your own spirit–
However, not everyone is meant to reach the levels I speak of; not everyone desires to truly, and this is quite fine.. but as a result, something between these two conflicting desires must arise that give a greater result than either of the two desires alone– Thus that ultimate is that desire of every individual in the way that allows for all desire to be met, and surpasses the limitation of the individual desire to only allow one aspect of the desire to be met–
We are dealing with far more fantastical things than you treat it, and without proper catalysts and stimulation; beyond your own ability to treat such fantasy seriously–
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