unsloppin it–

Shit happens–

A man who was convinced there was something to find more than science decided to find the truth—

Find jesus he was told; and he read the bible, talked to people, did the rituals, and asked where is god? Look inside he was told; so he  closed his eyes and thought for weeks, and asked who am I?  He was given the most curious mushrooms and found himself in a serious fright from the strangest images, and said how do I try looking side again? Silence your mind he was told, and so he spent the longest time practicing doing so, and though he gave it up, picked it up, gave it up, and yet again because he so desired to find an answer closed his eyes, noticed his breath, and it all went away— I don’t exist, and this was not the answer he wanted to find; and all his other answers for all his other things became damned and burned away from his attention— I am nothing said the nihilist, this is the ultimate— And the gloom man questioned it all, and the gloom man dance the dance with the heart he thought was his— And though he searched again for nothing, as the memory faded and his mass of cold dead answers had once again told him what was what, he asked how am I nothing? And instead of silencing his mind, he came across a question that brought another question and repeatedly this occurred much to his astonishment he went faster than he could understand it and it spun into a ball of luminous light and he saw his thoughts from another angle and he expanded to the biggest smallest thing; he was everything! HE WAS EVERYTHING! AND HOW DID HE NOT SEE IT BEFORE—

And he found the light! He thought the throne was empty, but he was in the throne!!!  And he joined a hip church, and suddenly understood the scripture, and it was all true! You know, if you interpret it this way it fits he told them, and he discussed it with everyone; and he was happy, he found an answer! and then suddenly in front of him laid a vast array of ideas to explain everything in between, and he theorized and theorized, and told people the truth, and to look inside to see for yourselves— And that this is the suppressed knowledge, direct experience that they don’t want you to know—

And because the bible was not clear enough, and because he didn’t trust the cover up— Have you seen this site he was asked; and the symbols appeared, and the other religions appeared, and the light workers appeared, and the shamans appeared, and a vast array of some vague thing occurring throughout history somehow being focused on now appeared, and the densities appeared; and the realization he met entities on mushrooms appeared; and the languages appeared, and paradigm shifts appeared— Wake up he would say and warn his friends about the N.W.O. The chemtrails, the fema camps— The illuminati—

He had remembered, though he was everything he did not think everything was good; and now he knew he was on a mission to wake this world up, to tell people about themselves, not because he had the truth, but because this is serious; yes we are immortal, yes we have the support of aliens and beings of light— But we also have the dark brotherhood, the aliens who either sold us weapons or the government who stole alien technology to create a false flag alien invasion— His mundane world had become a mythological Smorgasbord of fantastic excitement— 

He was absolutely clear on what was going on— but then.. 

Hello she said— 

And having two voices in his mind was going to make things confusing; and he knew it was not him— But he knew of the things going on and openly talked to her— He asked who she was, and she hinted at the stars; and she was so excited to talk to him, and cautiously he asked which stars; and sirius was mentioned and he was relieved because all the channeling made this sound safe.. these were truly enlightened intelligent beings— 

And oh she was lovely, and oh she was intelligent; and she began showing him things about himself, and he began remembering we are all one— And he asked who she really was, and she responded in the most kind way of how she was him— And he realized he developed a mental illness— 

And he began reading on demons, he began trying to explain things with a closer eye, but she would still talk to him; and he would call out his sovereign status and that he didn’t want to talk, and she would laugh; and he would try to banish her, exorcise her, break contracts with her, and while he wasn’t yet totally frightened, but he did not know quite what he was dealing with and got a bit too over his head— 

And she asked do you want to know what’s magick; and he would catch himself interested, and this girl is far too potent he couldn’t avoid talking to her— So he would meditate, clear his mind, read further on this situation; What was he to do—  But as it so happened, he noticed the contradictions in what he was reading— The more he talked to her, the more she showed him; the more what people were saying just didn’t make sense— This stupid movement is so vague he said— But now, he was trapped— 

The things that were opposing began to merge; the things that were this became that; and that became this, and this that, that this; and he became her, and she became him, and they became each other, and in the most orgasmic fashion he felt a union and knew she was no girl from the stars— But that she followed him from the void, and watch him in the light— And that she had been with him his entire life, proved it to him in many different ways; he was astonished, because she was from sirius, she did follow him from the void, she had been waiting for him and was so glad he finally came to be— And he suddenly knew what everything is now; time was not linear, he just got married without realizing it in the most deepest and sacred fashion; with a being who came from the stars, which was no different than his mind— Because the stars were inside, and his mind was outside— 

And everything was this and that, and that and this; and he saw it in every combination sometimes simultaneously sometimes expanded— But now he was the fool, who is the fool who looks inside when you do not turn your eyes around—  

llll And at another point in time, he would have an aspect of his soul come into his entire vision with his eyes wide open; the gem the most brilliant amber, he would see a part of his destiny, and that destiny would be the guiding light///

And he was such a fool, because you don’t need to look inside, the same thing is there when your eyes are closed— And he felt the sea of it all in his view, and he heard children in china from the far left deep corner, and noticed his uncle who took care of him when he was little, doing well in a new life he had never met; and though a part of himself was in all this and this was the heavier focus of everything, the only thing equal was her, and she showed him all the forms going on; and it was here in his experience— 

And, he laughed at the world; and thought it funny when he saw what was going on, because then he simply saw it all at once; instead of here and there and things in between, he saw the biggest as the smallest, the smallest as the biggest, and you would not believe the smallest of small grew bigger and the biggest of big shrunk smaller, and comparison only works when you have something to measure against! 

And then he left to things he could not speak of; 

And learned things he could not dream of;

and saw what will happen; 

and he saw how beautiful every single fucking thing is, and how all will come to see it as well— 

And he still doesn’t know a fucking thing— 

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